miel's silly ramblings

23/05/26 ☪ I JUST SUBMITTED AN EXPRESSION OF INTEREST IN VISITNG THE SPACE AGENCY OFFICES IN MY CITY. IM SO EXCITED I HOPE I GET TO GO SO BAD OMGGG. IDK WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF RN AHHHH

21/05/26 𝄞 When you read something you wrote ages ago and its not finished and you don't know enough about the source material or the project anymore to just straightup continue it right there and it feels like you've just stumbled on an incredible but unfinished ao3 fic. Bring the author back !!! They need to finish this for me !!!!!! wdym the author is me....

20/05/26 𝆚 Had this page linked to my tumblr for a while there but found that as a concept to be kind of boring. this blog page was in the original draft for this website and so I added it back! now that I'm in uni I think it will be nice to have somewhere to spit my meaningless thoughts where friends irl can't find them.

26/01/26 ⌨ saw another girl learning to drive today also with her dad in a uni carpark and we kept catching each other's eye (the nervous looking around lol) and so I waved at her and she waved back!! and when she and her dad left he waved at us! and idk I just loved the brief companionship. I'll never see her again or know anything else about her other than that we happened to be doing the exact same thing on a monday afternoon

14/10/25 🞒 Oh, wow. My sibling does school online, from home, and doesn't get news from anywhere, so she asked me to explain the situation with Palestine and man that was something. I don't really have any thoughts or comments about it, just that I was upset trying to explain it and struggling to keep a straight face. I just felt I should note it down somewhere.

23/09/25 ✤ CSS grid layout is really simple, actually. now I just need to figure out how to properly format the manga panels+ main article section (this text bit) so they look a bit more neat.

15/09/25 ✪ Okay, so. There was an event in our school theatre today, and me and my friends went to see it. Somehow I ended up next to two of them, but those two had their boyfriends on the other side of them and I was a little forgotten. RAHHHH GET RID OF YOUR BASIC ASS WHITE MEN GAHHHHH THEYRE NOT THAT SPECIAL it makes me think though, like i've kinda been thinking about wanting a partner again but it may just be the loneliness... like if more of my friends were single i think i'd be fine... sigh....

14/09/25 ✿ Went out with a friend today and got a good 3 hours ish of studying in, and then we walked around the city for a while and, of course, the conversation went to romance. My other friend was on a first date today, and if these two continue the way they're headed it looks like it's only going to be me and one other single friend in our group. And we have a fair sized group. The friend I was studying with asked me (as a joke?) 'So when's it gonna be your turn?' and yeah, I may only be on the aromantic spectrum rather than entirely aromantic, and to be fair, I did have some things to say to that effect, because I have had crushes before and continue to; but it still kind of hurts when people ask that. You can just leave me be... it's okay... being single is great actually... your boyfriend is a bit of a red flag but we aren't talking about that....

08/09/25 ✶ Working on my website again after a really dry creative period and I'm realising I actually like how it looks a lot. It's tacky, and not technical AT ALL, and really wordy with not a lot of interactivity, but that's not really my problem. I like how it looks, and it's my website. JavaScript can shove off !!! Maybe one day it will be more technical and maximalist and interactive but that day is NOT TODAY !!!!!!

31/08/25 ⯌ It was a friend's 18th birthday this week, and her party was yesterday. Proper highschool house party: underage drinking, randoms making out in corners, I think someone got broken up with. I've drunk alcohol before (vodka mixed with coke or cranberry juice, mostly) but I had three drinks today which is the highest I've got to before the vodka runs out (lol). They weren't even really shots, since me and my friends just estimate, and I definitely underestimate. But like, I didn't feel much? My friends tend to get drunk or close to at about three drinks, at least I think so, and I definitely felt that my reactions were a little slow and my filter a little loose, but that was all? And it wore off so fast? And I mean, I've never had a hangover before so it's not like I would know, but I don't really feel anything? If anything I slept a lot better than you would expect from going to bed at like 12am. I don't know if being a bit more of a heavyweight is inflating my ego or what but like, I guess I'm just asking what the point of it is. Drunk me may never see the light of day at this rate. This entry may disappear after I get to a higher number of like, actually measured shots.

20/08/25 ⯌ Trying to wrap my head around JavaScript to try and hide/show elements for my projects page, so you only have to look at one 'project' at a time, but it just doesn't seem to work. JavaScript is definitely not as intuitive as HTML or CSS and it's driving me a little mad. Some of it feel really familiar though? Like I've done a JavaScript workshop before (though I think I'm just recognising familiarities to python instead, from a workshop I did in Minecraft Education, lol) ? anyway, hasn't worked so far, and I'm relying on details tags which are kind of annoying. They worked well in the bookshelf page but definitely aren't going to work here. It's upsetting me. I want my website to be pretty and interactive but right now it's as simple as it can be and I can't seem to wrap my head around the slightly more difficult stuff. RAHH!! Doesn't help that the way I learn tends to be more that I'll work through something and search up what I can't figure out, which isn't working for JavaScript, but if I just go through the website I've been using to learn (see links) none of it sticks. Like am I gonna have to study it? sigh. On another note Florence + The Machine is releasing a new song in a couple hours, and I'm going absolutely feral, which I have never done for a music artist ever.

05/08/25 ⯌ Wore a headband to school today and got so many compliments I'm going to melt

04/08/25 ⯌ Today one of my teachers let me know that there was going to be someone from the animation industry come round at a time when I had a free period, so despite not knowing about it before today (unlike everyone else there, who had apparently been told previously or emailed about it) I rocked up with two of my friends. Because we're in our last year of highschool, we had the opportunity to hang back once the kids from younger years had left to talk to the two guys that turned up. It was so interesting hearing about the animation industry in Australia compared to that of the world, as it's not that often that you recognise a studio from here unless it's advertised (stuff like Bluey), but that Australia is actually one of the best countries for the animation industry right now because of how it's basically grown from a niche. Everyone in the industry is either queer, neurodivergent, both, or at the very least accepting, and it's all young people who grew up watching anime and love the craft itself. It's also heavily unionised, and the community looks out for each other and for studios that don't treat them fairly. I also heard a bunch of big names got animated here, that I had no clue about, like Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur, Hazbin Hotel, Digital Circus. Stuff you don't really look at and think, oh yeah, that got made in Australia. Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur was partially animated by some TAFE kids from Perth, which seems crazy. It's a Disney Marvel production.
It was really funny because I think I tricked them all into thinking I was interested in a career in the industry because I already knew some animation basics that my friends didn't, and gave Satoshi Kon as my answer for a favourite animation or studio or animator, who my friends didn't really know about. Even the more successful of the two animators there didn't recognise the name, which kind of fed my ego a little. He was the one teaching us how to use ToonBoom Harmony (we had a single-day subscription for the workshop) and it was gratifying how intuitive and easy to use the program was. Once you wrapped your head around some basics, it was really easy to use and the tools and features felt like they were really designed by an animator who's come across all the usual problems you'd have trying to make an animation. It's made in a way that references traditional-style animation, on a million pieces of paper with separate layers etc. wherein you can delete frames but still have the pages and move your entire page or just a little part of your drawing, etc etc. I enjoyed that the pencil tool utilises the way vector graphics works, and he taught us a really cool trick where you draw in shapes for your shading with the pencil tool, bucket tool your shadow colour in, and then make your pencil lines invisible. It works because while the brush tool works like a normal digital pen; just with vector laws, where the edges of your mark are the boundaries and in actuality is the vector you've just drawn, the pencil tool has the vector line running right through the middle of your mark, and the bucket tool recognises that vector line as its boundary rather than the outside of the mark you've made, so when you make your pencil mark's invisible there isn't any gap between the two different colours. I know it's industry standard basic stuff, but it blew my mind a little at how useful that would be. It really felt like the software had been made by artists, for artists; utilising aspects of digitising art-making that would truely benefit an animator, instead of by someone who thinks they know what artists would most be comfortable with.

??/07/25 ⯌ man i wish w3.css was like. standard. i want buttons without effort.

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